True Lexiefaye Vignettes

Money makes the world go around

This one is a classic (might be exagerated by now but all good stories are) and ALL my friends have heard it already but it's too good not to include ...

Lexie was three and a very miscevious child. She was an only child (My brother was born 2 years later) so she was good at playing loudly by herself. That's why when Lexie's mommy noticed that it was way too quiet upstairs, she knew something evil was afoot.

Mommy snuck up the stairs as quietly as she could so she could catch Lexie in the act redhanded. Mommy had almost made it safely but the third stair from the top made a creak. Was it enough to warn 3 year old Lexie? Would little Lexie get away with her trickery?

The smack of two pieces of wood hitting each other came from the master bedroom. Now she knew something was definitely wrong because Lexie was not in her own room with her own toys. When Mommy entered her bedroom nothing seemed amiss. Lexie was curled up on the bed peacefully ... but her eyes ... those eyes Mommy knew better than anyone ... read GUILTLY. But Mommy knew where the wood sound came from. She moved to Daddy's side of the bed and openned the wooden box where Daddy stored some of his money.

Mommy shreaked. Lexie had turned Daddy's money into an art project. She had cut out all the numbers, and all the letters and all the faces and put them in nice little piles. It was beautifully done and completely accurate. Lexie did this with all the ones, fives and was half way through the tens before she was caught. And when Mommy started yelling she really didn't understand what was wrong other than that she touched Daddy's stuff.

When Daddy entered the room, the picture was complete. He broke into uncontrolled laughter. Now Lexie was even more confused. But Daddy had a perfect idea ... why not stick all the money in a plastic bag and give it to Lexie as a sweet sixteen present. If she wanted the money, she had to tape it up herself ... because by then Lexie would understand what she did ....

Since then Lexie has put a fork in an outlet, glued PJs to her carpet, drawn exactly one line in the each section of the fancy cutout decoration of her parents' antique wooden cabinet, and gotten a paperclip stuck in a keyhole. Yet to this day she claims she has learned her lesson.

posted by Lexiefaye @ 3/14/2006